permeable boundaries, leaky cups, and the dance to protect and replenish energy

Have you ever noticed that some days you feel like you could conquer the world, while other days just answering emails feels like climbing Everest?

For years, I thought the secret was just finding the perfect recharge ritual. But through multiple burnout recoveries—that felt more like trial-and-error than recovery—I could no longer ignore that fact that...

Constantly refilling a leaking cup is exhausting.

This week, we're diving into one of the biggest pieces of the energy puzzle that gets missed and has helped transform my life and those of my clients: the delicate dance between protection and replenishment.

Because when they work together—like partners in a choreographed dance—magic happens. Your business scales more smoothly, your life feels richer, and you can finally break up with those mid-week crashes instead of being besties.

Let's dive in...

🌱 TIPS FOR A MORE SUSTAINABLE LIFE + BUSINESS 

Why Two is Better Than One

Has your house ever looked like a shrine to self-care—meditation apps on your devices, tea collections and tinctures, gratitude journals—all purchased in desperate attempts to feel less exhausted? Yet somehow, Wednesday would roll around every week and there you are, staring blankly at your laptop, wondering why you felt like a smartphone perpetually stuck at 15% battery.

SAME. This was me, for years.

Something wasn't adding up. Turns out, I was only seeing half the picture.

And finding the perfect recharge ritual wasn't the magic pill—it was realizing that trying to fill a leaking cup is an exercise in frustration.

What's that saying? "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” (famously attributed to Albert Einstein but not actually something he said.)

Here's what nobody tells you: Those mid-week energy crashes aren't proof you're not trying hard enough. They're your body's way of saying "this system isn't working for the humans involved."

What actually works is approaching your energy from both sides:

First, stop the leaks. This looks like noticing when you feel that familiar tension creeping into your shoulders during certain meetings and asking, "Do I actually need to be here?" It's creating buffer time between events, outings, or calls instead of back-to-back scheduling because "that's what successful people do." It's recognizing that sometimes saying "I'll think about it and get back to you" often preserves more energy than an immediate yes or no.

Then, actually refill. Not with what Instagram says should work, but with what actually makes YOU feel restored. For some, it's loud music and dancing. For others, it's complete silence. The key is identifying what genuinely brings your nervous system back to baseline—not what you think should work.

I watched this click for a client recently—someone everyone else saw as having an impressive self-care routine but who still felt constantly depleted. "I'm doing all the 'right' things," they told me, "so why do I feel like I'm running on fumes?"

Together we created what they now call their "energy guardrails"—simple communication templates for clients, time blocks that align with their natural focus periods, and permission to move meetings that fall during their known energy dips. Within weeks, they messaged me: "I actually forgot to do my evening meditation yesterday because I didn't feel like I needed it—my day hadn't run me ragged. That's NEVER happened before."

Try This: This week, when you feel that familiar energy drop, pause for just 10 seconds and ask yourself: "Is this asking for protection or refill?" Which feels more supportive in that moment? Then trust and honor whatever answer comes up with one small action—whether that's closing your email tab for 30 minutes or stepping outside for five minutes of fresh air or taking a whole mental health day.

Sometimes we don't know which feels more supportive, and if you find yourself there, my advice is to just pick one and try it. See how it goes and the next time, try the other. Pay attention to how you feel after each type—protection or refill—and start to see what patterns form. 

Think about how would you move through this week if you no longer saw exhaustion as personal failing, but simply valuable data about what your system needs? I'm curious about what shifts for you when you look at it this way - drop me a note if something clicks!

✨ TIPS FOR A MORE SOULFUL LIFE

Why Your Boundaries Keep Failing You (And How to Fix That)

You know that moment? When you're watching the sunset over the lake with friends, drink of choice in hand, and a little voice whispers: "You should really get to bed early for your 5am routine tomorrow."

Or when you're at that conference you spent a fortune on, and a fascinating conversation runs late into the night, but your "non-negotiable" meditation practice looms at dawn.

It's easy to feel that tension and think, "I suck at boundaries." 

But I'd argue, it has nothing to do with failure. It's you bumping up against the unspoken truth that most productivity advice conveniently ignores:

The boundaries that actually work for real humans aren't walls—they're membranes.

I spent years believing good boundaries meant saying a rigid "no" regardless of circumstance. The result? Either I'd miss magical moments that feed my soul, or I'd break my own rules and spiral into shame for "lacking discipline."

Neither path led to feeling good.

What I've discovered—both personally and with clients who struggled with this same tension—is that sustainable boundaries actually breathe with the natural rhythms of your life. They expand to let in unexpected joy and contract to provide structure when you need it most.

This idea is called "permeable boundaries," and they're built on a simple truth: 

Your values stay constant, but how they show up changes based on context.

For example, maybe creativity is a core value:

• At home with full energy: You're drafting that passion project for 2 hours of focused work
• At home but depleted: You're flipping through art books with a cup of tea
• While traveling with energy: You're exploring a local museum off the tourist path
• While traveling but depleted: You're people-watching from a café

All four honor creativity—but they look radically different.

The magic happens when you trust yourself to recognize the difference between "This boundary needs to hold firm right now" and "This is a moment worth shifting for."

That discernment isn't weakness—it's power and wisdom.

This week's topic is as much for you as it is for myself. Discernment is a huge part of my personal work this year and I think I needed to write this week's soulful section for you, but also as a reminder to myself that this is a process.

As summer approaches with its backyard gatherings, road trips, and schedule disruptions, permeable boundaries become the secret weapon for enjoying those one-of-a-kind moments without completely losing our center.

Reflection: Think about a value that matters deeply to you. How might it express itself differently when:

• You're feeling energized at home?
• You're feeling depleted at home?
• You're energized but away from your normal environment?
• You're both depleted AND away from home?

What permeable boundary could honor this value across all these states while still protecting your wellbeing?

Consider what would it feel like if your boundaries could be both strong AND flexible enough to let life's sweetest moments in? If you have a story about a time when permeable boundaries served you well (or when rigid ones didn't!), I'd love to hear it - those real-life examples are priceless!

📈 TIPS FOR A MORE SCALEABLE BUSINESS

The Hidden ROI Your Spreadsheets Can't See

When a consulting client I worked with first looked at their "most profitable" client on paper, they were shocked to discover it was secretly bankrupting their most valuable resource—the team's energy.

On paper, this client was generating over 30% of all recurring revenue, but when we mapped out how much mental, emotional, and creative capacity they consumed?

They were taking up 70% of the bandwidth. Yikes 😅

This is the missing metric most business owners never track... but it might be one of the most important ones of all.

We've been trained to obsess over financial metrics: revenue, profit margins, customer acquisition costs. These numbers matter, of course. But especially for service providers and personal brands, there's another form of capital flowing through your business that rarely shows up in your P&L: your energy investment.

When you start tracking the relationship between your energy and your business performance, three powerful competitive advantages emerge naturally:

1. Your innovation skyrockets. When your brain isn't constantly toggling between urgent tasks and putting out fires, you suddenly have the mental space to see patterns and opportunities others miss. One client described it as "finally being able to see the forest instead of just desperately maintaining each tree."
2. You become remarkably adaptable. Remember how a good night's sleep helps you handle curveballs that would derail you when exhausted? That same principle applies to your business. With energy reserves intact, trends and market shifts become opportunities rather than existential threats.
3. Your client experience transforms. Ever notice how clients respond when you show up energized versus depleted? One business owner I worked with implemented energy-aligned workflows for their team and suddenly clients weren't just raving about the "quality" or "presence and attentiveness" of the founder's work, but every team member's—scaling their customer experience without changing a single thing about their actual service delivery.

So how do you actually measure this invisible ROI? Here are two metrics to start with:

• Energy-Time Exchange Rate: Not all hours in your workday are created equal. I learned this the hard way with my newsletter writing. During my natural creative peaks, I could produce this newsletter in about 2 hours. During energy dips? The exact same task took 6 hours and left me feeling like I'd run a marathon (I am not a runner... lol.)
  
  By simply moving writing to my high-energy periods and administrative tasks to my natural dips, I increased my output by 40% while actually working less intensely. No productivity hack, app, or outsourcing could have delivered that ROI.
  
  
• Energy-Based Value Assessment: For service-based businesses especially, some projects drain disproportionate energy relative to what they pay. One client had a $25,000 project that required constant revisions and midnight emails, while a $15,000 project with clear boundaries and aligned work felt effortless.

You don't necessarily need to overhaul your entire pricing structure tomorrow. Start by simply adding a new column to your project evaluation: energy expenditure. Rate each client or project from 1-10 on both financial return and energy cost. The patterns that emerge might surprise you.

Next Step: Look at your last three months of work. Identify your three highest-revenue projects or clients and your three most energizing ones. Where do you see overlap? Where do you see misalignment? What would change if you prioritized the alignment between these two metrics this quarter?

Ask yourself - What if the secret to scaling your business isn't working longer hours or hiring more people, but simply aligning your most valuable work with when you're naturally at your best? How would that change your next quarter? I'd love to hear your thoughts - hit reply!